Do's and Don't's on Pursing a Girl

This post has been moved to the blog Love Played Out, my official blog on love, sex and relationships. 

I Can't Be Perfect But I Can Be Faithful

David, a man after God's own heart....yet a king who committed adultery and murder. Sometimes I think, how can a King, an individual with such authority commit not just one but two evil deeds. David saw a married woman bathing and because of his lustful desires decided to have her for his own.....then, in order to cover up he placed her husband (a military man) in the frontline at battle, assuring his death. David consciously committing such great wrongs...how can anyone, especially a man of his stature be considered a man after God's own heart....?

But am I so different......

I may have not committed murder but how deadly have my words been and how many women have I lusted over and inappropriately pursued? My relationships are broken and my speech is impaired...How can I talk about David when my life cliff falls into the same abyss?

Well as my good friend Micah Bournes pointed out, Proverbs 24:16 says "For the righteous falls seven times and rises again." 

Am I considered righteous because I can live "right".....because I never make a mistake? If I do wrong am I considered unrighteous? If so, then how can this Proverb say that the righteous fall 7 times....

the righteous fall....

the righteous fall....

the righteous fall....

the righteous fall....

the righteous fall....

the righteous fall....

the righteous fall....

                             ...........and rises again. 

How can one be considered righteous when one falls so many times? 

Well like David, my standing is not determined by whether I do good or bad, it is determined by what God has done in my life. God has reached out and accepted me as his child, therefore declaring me righteous. There is no wrong I can do to remove myself from his love, nor is there any right I can do to make him love me more. God is love. It is not what he does, it is who he is and because of that I am considered righteous. 

With a shameful yet repenting heart, I do not take away from my actions. I take full responsibility for my actions, but I thank God for his forgiving grace. I rejoice knowing he wipes my slate clean...making it white as snow. I am not deserving of this I know, fortunately that is the definition of His grace. 

May my prayer be like David's

Psalm 51

A Call from the President

What if the President of the United States called my phone and gave me a top secret mission? What if he said, "Hey Jerry, I need a favor from you, I need you to deliver this mail cross country, unfortunately it cannot be flown due to its delicacy. can you do it?" I can only imagine that I would drop everything, no matter the task and the location and immediately begin positioning myself for my mission. I would make sure that I had a trustworthy vehicle to make the delivery successfully. The list of food and items I would consume in the time of my mission would be strictly to give me more energy and keep me alert. I would make sure to work out more thoroughly and consistently in order to be physically ready for anything that comes my way. My conversations would change, they would be filtered through the lens of my top secret mission. I would stay on top of my finances in order to use my money wisely. Even the way I relate to my friends would change. There would be no time for foolish talk, no time for pointless dates, no time to sit around and do nothing. The mission is on the plate and only I can deliver at this time. I would make sure that this mail would be guarded at all times until its point of arrival.

Alright, so thats a bit of an extreme case, but what if the President called me and said "Hey Jerry can you watch my daughter's pet turtle?" Even then, the fact that it is not just any person but the president asking me to do such a simple favor, I can imagine my immediate response would be to drop everything and take care of that turtle like no one has ever before. Knowing it was the turtle of the daughter of the United States changes everything. 

In either of these two cases I have been entrusted with something and became a steward of what is not mine but belongs to the President. At that point I would want to be the best steward I absolutely can be. 

The other day a good friend, Cody Abercrombie, said, "We are stewards of a king, not just a king, but The king."

I can't tell you how much these words have impacted me these past few days. God has entrusted me in this life to carry out his mission. He has given me a specific calling in order to enhance His kingdom. He has called me to be a steward of His creation........yet, I have failed so poorly. 

Why is it that if the President calls me I respond with such urgency and with the calling from God I so arrogantly take advantage and manipulate my surroundings in order to fit the mission in my own desires? I do not treat the resources he has given me with such care, I do not stay focused on the mission, I do not place my time and energy in order to execute His mission. I do not strengthen myself spiritually and physically in order to be equipped for life's curve balls. I do not keep my finances on check, in order to use the money given to me, wisely. I do not filter my conversations through the lens of His mission. I do not treat my friendships as wholesome as I should. I do not treat women with the understanding that they are not just daughters of a king.....they are daughters of THE King. How saddening it is to think that I would more respectfully take care of the turtle of the daughter a President than I am to take care of the daughters of the King. I do not manage my home with patience and love, I do not discipline myself in the character of integrity in order to be without blame and shame. I do not lead to empower and equip..........the list goes on.

The point is this; the desires of my heart have reflected a self centered lifestyle rather than a God-centered one. Which, in turn reflects how I treat the things and the people God has placed in my life. My world view is filthy and tainted in a lifestyle that rots in its own aroma. .........

The wonderful news is this, God, a ruler is also God, a forgiver. Today, I choose repentance; today I choose forgiveness; today, I chose obedience. 

I hope you do not read this and jump quick to judgment, rather, I hope you read this and perhaps relate to it and like myself seek out a heart of repentance. 

2 Year Anniversary

Today marks my 2 year anniversary at Bottega Louie...sometimes its hard to think about doing the same thing, 5 days a week for a consecutive 2 years....its easy to get caught up in the thought of annoying costumers, long hours or lack of, conflicting personalities with coworkers, not making enough money.....etc. Yes, I can sit here and complain of all those things, but this last year God has taught me a valuable lesson, especially after pursuing art full time.

Don't try to put a period where God intended to put a comma. (Words of a great preacher, Dante Geber)

After my first year I was desperately looking to leave Bottega Louie, little did I know of all the blessings I would be missing out on. I asked God for a sign to get out of Bottega Louie, I couldn't stand being there. I felt like I was wasting my time with everything......but no signs came a long. Even in my searching for another job; no responses, no interviews, I couldn't get a thing......I kept moving a long and trusting God, yet every month I made it my goal to leave. (haha so much for that)

Then my back began to hurt (again) and I had to stop all dancing. Long story short, instead of wasting time laying around I picked up the paint brush again, striking my other hidden passion. I did not have much money, okay I was actually broke, so I bought the cheapest paint I could find.....watercolor, 5 bucks for the set.

This opened up a new journey, and the more art work I did the more positive feed back I would get. Little by little I began networking at Bottega Louie again and God started opening doors. I have met people in all walks in life, building friendships locally and internationally, getting referred to credible others they know......Now, I have art work in galleries, competitions, a Boba Shop and getting paid to do what I love doing. Through this process I have realized that I need this job more than any other to achieve my goals in the future. I honestly cannot wait to see what the next two years will look like!

Take this away with you....

I ignorantly and selfishly asked God for a 'sign' to get out of my situation.....when God was just asking me to walk by faith. In my mind, I see God chuckle at our requests sometimes. He says, walk by faith, and we say "GIVE US A SIGN." Would not walking by faith indicate that we are moving forward without "signs," that we need to trust Him more.......Looking back at this last year I've noticed the signs came afterwards. He gave me the passion and confirmation after I continued walking in his trust. So I would encourage you, rather than asking over and over for a sign from God, trust Him, continue forward and wait for the signs after your faith.

Same-o Same-o

For as long as I can remember the simple questions, "How is everything?" has generally been followed up with something a long the lines of "Oh you know, same-o same-o." While I used to be more acceptable to that response, recently I have been flustered with such a mediocre response.

"Same-o Same-o" is usually expressed in a tone of pity or an expression that says "I can't seem to catch a break......."And back then I would attempt to sympathize with the individual but recently, a little more emotionally driven, I have been following up with the question "well, what are you doing to change that?" ....... and their silence or poor excuses says it all. 

It is mind boggling to me when someone desires positive change so eagerly in their life yet does nothing to achieve it. In my small yet meaningful 25 years of existence I have realized a few things, one of which is that, the type of change that naturally occurs tends to be a negative one. As life runs its course there are natural disasters that happen; like lost of job, home, death, disease, sickness, pain, broken bodies, broken hearts.....the list goes on. So we can assume when we do nothing for change, the type of change that will most likely occur is negative. Think of it like a garden, if the garden is not cultivated and maintained seasonally by the gardener, the garden will naturally be covered with weeds and produce less fruit. While it may still be considered a garden it may never reach the full potential of its true beauty. And we wonder why when we do nothing for change, why our lives seem alright or same-o same-o.

Now I am not saying anything bad about being content. We must always be content with what has been given to us and not coveting or grieving over the things we do not have. But being content does not mean we do not seek for greatness, it simply means to be grateful where you are without complaining.

It is when we are intentional about positive change that we can begin to see it in our lives. The best advice given to me when graduating college was to walk through as many open doors as possible. You never know what will be on the other side......it can be a dead end or it can be a door of endless opportunities (or other doors). But you will never know that if you are just sitting there waiting for opportunities to arise. We need to take initiative. The reason relationships flourish is because we work on them....we don't just let life takes its course on them, they will wither and die. We need to take initiative at work, thats how we get promoted. We need to save and increase our income to move into a bigger home and raise a family. We need to exercise our bodies to maintain health and a strong physique. These things do not just fall from the sky. We need to stop living with this "same-o same-o" destructive mindset and pursue greatness. Strive for positive change regardless what others may say or think. Make the change, don't wait for it.

Opportunities are not mysterious events that randomly occur in our lives, they are roads on which we should intentionally, purposefully and constantly take. 

Rubber Band King

In middle school I used to be the rubber band king. Loaded with rubber bands ready to take fire at anyone who dared to stand up to me. All pockets full of ammunition, both wrists covered with rubber, hiding them in places you would not expect. When the teachers started taking them away from other students I would hide them around my bicep, beneath my sleeve keeping them out of sight. Because of this, My determination set me apart, while my competitors were slowly being disarmed by the higher authorities I remained strong, leading the pack. 

With time not only did my determination become stronger, but my precision became better. I was more focused, I was faster, I could hit a target from across the room. A fellow classmate's eyes suffered the consequence of my precision. The secret to shooting a rubber band was to stretch it as far as possible with out snapping it, knowing where its breaking point was. Then aiming straight through your finger onto your target, keeping your eyes on the goal at all times, even when those around you are trying to disarm and remove your resources. 

Well, today I do not hold the title as rubber band king anymore, as I have retired that juvenile mindset and taken on real life responsibilities. But I cannot help to meditate on the picture of the rubber band and what it represents in my life and those around me. 

For example my youngest sister, Jasmine, taking bold steps in order to pursue not only a passion in her life but also to better her character. At the age of eighteen she moved cross country leaving what she knows as home, in order to enter an unknown world to pursue a dream. Then entering an internship where she tells the leaders, "I don't like to speak in public, so I am asking you to pick on me to speak in front of others." as well as, "I know I am eighteen, but I do not want to be treated in that way, give me responsibilities you would entrust an older adult with." She wakes up every morning with the mentality of being bold, "How can I be more bold today?"

I have been utterly surprised by her willingness to step up and her desire to be challenged and be bold. Like a rubber band being stretched further and further back. Stretching in character, taking steps of boldness, over and over again and reaching further back, within and upward in order to be shot further in life. See, when you stretch a rubber band to its maximum it can pierce through the air across the room and nail the target on the head. 

Now, I am not referring to being busy. Being busy is a lousy excuse to sound productive yet accomplish nothing. I am referring to being stretched more and more with precision as your guide. Staying focused on the goal, keeping your eyes on the prize. 

I do not consider myself the rubber band king because I am no longer the one shooting the rubber band, rather I am the one piercing life. Like the rubber band and my sister, I seek out opportunities to be stretched till my breaking point, in order to soar in leaps and bounds through life; aiming at my targets and goals. The more bold I am, the more steps in faith I take, the greater the reward is. 

My question to you is, are you like the rubber band that is stretched further and further back, in order to shoot further in life? Or are you like rest of the rubber bands that remain in the bag, untouched by the king, and become fragile, and snap easily due to lack of use? You have a choice, we have a choice. Lets choose to be bold. 

Golden 25 on 25

"One of my favorite things about you Jerry is that whatever you touch turns into gold" 

These were the words of one of my amazing mentors many years ago, Henry Bouma. These words have yet to escape great value in my heart, because they not only speak life but bring about a sense of responsibility and humility for my daily actions.

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Growing up I anticipated this day, I thought of the many ways I was going to celebrate my Golden Birthday. Turning 25 on July 25th 2013 meant a ridiculous party, gathering all the people I know under one roof, having food, DJ's, dancers, lights....or maybe it meant I would go to Vegas for the first time. Staying at a fancy hotel, going out at night, living it up! Someone once gave me the idea to celebrate it on a yacht, or going scuba diving.....the options were endless. When it came to my Golden birthday all I wanted was to feel like gold.

Well as time has gone by especially the days leading up to my birthday, my mentality began to take a shift. My whole life I have aspired to be different, not in the sense of rebellion but in the direction of proper moral conduct, responsibility, maturity, respect for women and others, purpose living, mission oriented, visionary, leader, man of faith...... (although, in today's society a young man 18-25 pursuing these things can be considered a rebel going against the norm). In dreaming about my birthday I began to lose sight of what I have been living for. These new desires of wanting to go to vegas and party it up were rooted from what the world does and not from what my purpose in life is.

I think of writing an essay.....I have one thesis and every word written in this paper should reflect that thesis. The moment you take off on a tangent is the moment your paper loses direction and purpose.....Well I, like that essay, do not want to lose sight of what my thesis in life is. I do not want my birthday to be a tangent in life, that steers me away from the path I am on.

So while I am on this journey of pursing my arts for God, I want my golden birthday to be a pivot point, a mild stone, a launching pad that shoots me in the direction of executing my dreams.

Today I publicly introduce two new areas in my life.

1. "Thus Art" - the name I will use for my art website and new instagram; ThusArt. As I am building on my paintings, cartoons, drawings.....etc I need a home to market all my work. (Business cards are also in the process of being made) I am so excited for this. My art work will potentially be featured at different art walks and hopefully a part of next years Comic Book Convention in San Diego!

I love the word 'thus' because it stems from the preceding text and enlightens you in the following.

2. MProClean - this company was started in Michigan by my mother as a house cleaning company. Today I bring it to Los Angles. I have sat down with different business mentors and entrepreneurs who have guided me in the right direction. This cleaning company will not only provide a phenomenal cleaning service here in Los Angeles, but it will be the supporting backbone to my art.

(please keep in mind websites are under construction)

Growing up I have always hustled and had the business man mentality. I previously wrote a blog, E'ry day I'm Hustlin'  that talks about my journey as an entrepreneur and how one of my goals is to start a business in Los Angeles......well the time has come. I created the logo, finalized the domain name, working on the website, talked with potential clients......the ball is rolling. What was a goal yesterday, today is a reality!

So for my golden birthday, I do not need to go to Vegas, or spend a ton of money on a party.......For my golden birthday I plan on starting my official Art company (ThusArt) and a quality cleaning service (MProClean).

Anyone can say they went to Vegas to celebrate a special day, but how many people can say they started two different companies on their Golden birthday?

#boom #toma